As the saying goes, ‘you can’t win ’em all,’ and in pro football this rings especially true. When the good teams lose, they learn from the game film, move on, and win the big one when it counts. After a 15-1 regular season, the defending champion Green Bay Packers entered the playoffs with the highest of hopes only to lose, handily, at Lambeau Field to the 9-7 Giants. But like a true champion, the Packers have emerged from this heavy cloud of disappointment with a newfound focus on the challenge that lies ahead.
“We’ve got to just dust ourselves off and come out strong this Sunday in the Pro Bowl,” said NFC starting QB, Aaron Rodgers, who will have the pleasure of receiving snaps from Green Bay center Scott Wells. “We played the worst game of our season a few weeks ago and it proved costly, but we are determined to not disappoint in Honolulu, discount doublecheck,” he added with confidence.
With the entire country watching (for no more than 3 minutes after stumbling across the game while flipping through channels,) the Packers, who can boast the most players in the Pro Bowl and the least in the Superbowl (tied with 30 other teams,) have the opportunity to put all of their focus on this one game and turn their season from a bitter disappointment to a roaring success.
“With the likes of Ben Roethlisberger, Arian Foster and A.J. Green lining up against you, it’s like fifty playoffs games all rolled into one,” observed starting linebacker Clay Matthews, “which is why Charles [Woodson], B.J [Raji] and I have been poring over this new defensive system to make sure we are one-hundred-percent prepared for anything our opponents have to throw at us.”
“The new defensive system just tells us to play defense,” noted Raji, who has been working tirelessly to get up the hill leading to the Aloha Stadium for the game. And play defense they will, for losing this time around simply is not an option according to veteran safety Charles Woodson.
“We can’t be fooled by the lack of enthusiasm, the strange way the sunlight plays on the field, or the fact that everybody is running around at half-speed and telling racist jokes in the huddle,” commented Woodson, “this game is all we’ve got, and we’re gonna get it.”
“Do we get like, a trophy if we win, or something? Maybe a commemorative t-shirt?” he added.
The Pro Bowl will be played at something weird o’clock, (5 P.M? 11:45 AM?) on a channel you will inevitably stumble across at some point during your day before chuckling at the idea of watching the pro-bowl and continuing on with your life. The winner of the game will in fact receive a $25 gift certificate from Modell’s Sporting Goods.