Georgetown Class Trip to Fish Market Turns Sour

A recent class trip to the local Chinatown fish market took a turn for the worse when students got into an argument over the going price of cod. The Georgetown students, who had been studying aquatic life for the past month, felt that they had a sincere understanding of the market when they embarked on their field trip to Chinatown to see, first-hand, the role that fish played in every day life. Local fish traders, however, proved to be nothing but contentious and wildly unhelpful.

“We had been studying the most popular types of fish, their habitat, their diet… we even got an aquarium in our classroom so that the students could learn to take care of the marine life themselves,” said the students’ teacher, Mr. Thompson. “We had no idea we were simply preparing for a race war.”

Upon arriving at the fish market, however, all the students’ hard work was  put into question. Armed with the knowledge that cod is one of the most prevalent fish in the Mid-Atlantic region, the students were shocked to learn that they were going for $6.99/lb in Chinatown. “If that’s the market price, then fuck the market,” shouted 16th grader Chris Wright toward the local traders. All hell then broke loose.

In the aftermath of the unpleasantness, students and their families have been refunded the $25 class trip fee and all future field trips have been suspended indefinitely.

Solomon Crosby


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